


Can I Have This Much?

by destieldrabblesdaily



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Roommates, Supernatural AU - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-10
Updated: 2014-06-10
Packaged: 2018-02-04 03:50:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1764527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destieldrabblesdaily/pseuds/destieldrabblesdaily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel has a major crush on his best friend Dean, whom he also shares an apartment with. He assumes that it's a one sided attraction, until one night he finds out that it isn't...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can I Have This Much?

If there is one fact in life that Castiel Novak is certain of, it’s that being in love with your best friend _sucks_. Tremendously. And when said best friend also happens to be the person that you share an apartment with, the temptation is a daily struggle. Of course it isn’t Castiel’s fault that Dean is funny, and clever, and kind, and on top of that ridiculously good looking. Castiel is only human, and after two years of living with Dean, his once innocent crush has now reached the level ‘head over heels’.

Nights like tonight are the worst. Castiel has been working late, and when he finally makes it back to the apartment, he knows that Dean won’t be there. His friend is supposed to be on a date with Bela, a girl he’d been seeing for a couple of months now. Castiel can’t help it that the mere thought makes him sick to his stomach with jealousy, but he knows that he has no other choice but to suck it up. He loves Dean, but because he knows that it’s a one sided kind of love, he wants Dean to be happy and go on dates.

Castiel plans to go to bed early and sleep this Friday night away, but when he turns the key in the lock and opens the door to the apartment, he finds that Dean is very much _there_ on the couch in the living room. He briefly wonders if maybe Dean had invited Bela over instead of going out, but when Castiel glances around the room, he sees that the only company that Dean has is the half empty bottle of whiskey in his hand.

Dean looks up at the sound of the door, smiling at Cas. “Heya Cas.”

It doesn’t take long for Castiel to figure out what’s going on.

“You’re drunk.” He states, tossing the keys on the table before sitting down beside his friend.

“Maybe…” Dean mumbles, blinking up at Castiel with his exceptionally green eyes.

“Definitely.” Castiel corrects, squinting his eyes as he takes the bottle away from Dean. “Aren’t you supposed to be on your date with Bela?”

“Yup…” Is the only response Castiel gets.

Without a warning, Dean snuggles into Castiel’s side, resting his head on Castiel’s shoulder. As pleasant as it feels, it mainly serves to confuse him.

“Would you care to elaborate, Dean?”

Dean shrugs, reaching for the bottle again, but Castiel pulls it away before his friend can close his fingers around the neck.

“Dean?”

No reply. Castiel sighs, knowing very well that a drunk Dean is not the most cooperative Dean.

“Fine… She broke up with me, Cas!” Dean suddenly blurts out.

“Oh…”

For a split second Castiel feels bad for being more happy than sad about that little piece of information.

“Yeah, oh.” Dean mimics.

A short silence, during which Castiel places the bottle on the table in front of them, out of the Winchester’s reach.

“And you know… I’m not even that sad about it.” Dean suddenly volunteers. “You know why… why she broke up with me? What her reason was?”

Castiel arches his eyebrows, considering Dean’s question. He honestly couldn’t imagine why anyone would ever let Dean go. He sure as hell wouldn’t.

“I don’t know, Dean. Why don’t you tell me?”

And then suddenly, Dean is rambling in his slightly slurry tone. “She said I talk too much… about _you_. She said I needed to spend more time with her… less with you. She whined about how I should have invited her along to Bobby and Ellen’s wedding, not you… She complained that I should’ve asked her along when we went to visit Sam in California last weekend, not you. She said… that there had to be less Cas and more Bela…”

Dean is resting heavily against Castiel now, his warm breath tickling the side of Castiel’s neck as he speaks. And fuck if Dean’s confession didn’t make Castiel feel guilty to the core.

“Dean… I’m sorry. You could’ve told me, I can understand Bela’s reasoning, she is your girlfriend. Well was… I guess you _should_ have done those things with her. We do spend a lot of time together, you should’ve told me that it was a problem…”

Unexpectedly, Dean snorts. “No, but that’s not why I’m… why I’m sad. I’m glad she broke up with me… because… can I tell you a secret?”

Castiel turns his head to study the now serious look on Dean’s freckled face.

“Of course. Let’s hear it, Dean.”

Dean leans impossibly closer, pretending to whisper into Castiel’s ear, even though there’s no need to be secretive with it just being the two of them. “I’m glad she broke up with me because I don’t want _less_ _Cas_. I want… I want _more Cas_. Bela always complains about everything I should do differently, you don’t. Bela always… tells me I should _change_ , and you never do that. Bela doesn’t know me, but you do… And Bela… has blue eyes, but all I can think about when I look at her is that they’re not as blue as yours… I love your eyes, Cas…”

Castiel has to laugh, coming to the conclusion that drunk Dean truly has no filter. Still, those words light up a very traitorous spark of hope within him.  

“You know, you can have as much Cas as you want, Dean. No need for you to drink yourself into a coma over that.” He comments when Dean looks up at him from under his lashes, clearly waiting for a reaction.

“Really? You promise?” Dean asks softly, his hand reaching for Castiel’s.

Castiel rolls his eyes but nods as he gladly takes the invitation and intertwines their fingers, resting both their hands in his lap. “Yes, I promise.”

When Dean sits a little straighter and brings his face level with Castiel’s, so close that their noses are touching, Castiel knows that he is lost. He can smell the whiskey on Dean’s breath, but he can’t be bothered by it.

“You said that I can have as much Cas as I want…” Dean mumbles, his lips barely skimming along Castiel’s as he speaks. “Can I have… _this_ much?”

That is probably the easiest question that Castiel ever had to answer in his life. This is also the best feeling he has _ever_ felt in his existence.

“Yes, Dean… Yes you can.”

Castiel makes his point by gently pressing his lips to Dean’s, closing his eyes as he finally gets to revel in the feeling that he’s been dying to experience ever since the day he first met his best friend.

**Author's Note:**

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